“There’s a sucker born every minute” David Hannum (in Reference to P.T Barnum’s Customers)

1. The Cardiff Giant

What was the Cardiff Giant?

The Cardiff Giant was one of the most famous hoaxes in the history of the United States. Essentially it was a 10 foot petrified man that was purported to have been unearthed from the soil of the town of Cardiff New York.

Who did it?

The giant was the creation of a New York tobacconist named George Hull.

Why did he create this hoax?

While visiting one of his rock quarries, hull noticed a piece of stone that looked like it had human veins running through it. At this point he thought to himself “I bet if I carved up that stone to look like a human giant I could get the last laugh on those Methodists” (Hull, an atheist, decided to create the giant after an argument at a Methodist revival meeting about the passage in Genesis 6:4 stating that there were giants who once lived on Earth)

Hull then instructed some workers to cut a giant slab from the veined stone, which he later shipped to Chicago where he had hired a stone cutter named Edward Burghardt to carve this biblical giant. (Burghardt was unaware that he was carving a statute for a hoax). Once finished, he had some trusted allies bury the giant underground where it would lay in wait for one year.

Around a year later, some fossils were found nearby, and Hull used this discovery to spring his hoax into action.

Ordering to workers to dig a well where the giant was buried, two laborers made what they thought would be the discovery of a lifetime! Rushing to tell the whole town, word spread fast and eventually had people showing up from all over the country to look at (and pay admission for) the stone giant from biblical times.

Scientists and experts came to the conclusion that it was either a true fossilized human giant or an authentic ancient statue. Nobody, said it was a hoax.

P.T. Barnum, noticed all the commotion and attempted to buy the statue to show in his museum. When the price came back as $50,000 (Hull had sold 2/3rds of the statue to a banker named David Hannum) Barnum decided it was easier to create his own fake statue.

He then declared that Hannum sold him the original and that the one in Cardiff was just a fake. After this news, thousands flocked to Barnum’s exhibit to which David Hannum was quoted as saying “There’s a sucker born every minute” …… (He still believed his statue to be real)

2. The Lying Stones

The Lying Stones

What were the lying stones?

The lying stones were limestone that had been carved into the shapes of lizards, frogs, spiders, and other animals. The stones also had in them the carved name of God in Latin, Arabic, and Hebrew characters.

Who Discovered them?

Professor Johann Bartholomeus Adam Beringer (ca 1667 – 1738) of the faculty of medicine at the university of Wurzburg.

Who Created this Hoax?

Hoaxers by the name of J. Ignatz Roderick (ex Jesuit) and professor of geography and mathematics, and Johann Georg von Eckhart.

Why did they do it?

They didn’t like him. They felt that Beringer was arrogant and needed a “comeuppance”

Essentially, they hid the stones on Mount Eibelstadt (a place where Beringer frequently went to search for fossils.)

The stones included “lizards in their skin, birds with beaks and eyes, spiders with their webs, and frogs copulating.” Other stones lain there bore the Hebrew letters YHVH, for Jehovah, or God.

When Beringer found them He believed them to be natural products of the “plastic power” of the inorganic world.

When critics pointed out that there was evidence of chisel marks, Beringer became convinced that they were the chisel marks of God. In fact nobody could convince him otherwise, not even the hoaxers.

The hoaxers had been putting more and more crazy rocks on the mountain for him to find, at first finding the whole thing amusing. However, the whole hoax started to get out of hand and they tried to convince him that maybe “someone else” was playing a hoax on him.

Beringer decided that they were just trying to discredit his great discovery, and brought them to court to “save his honor”

Unfortunately when he did this, they confessed the whole story. The careers of all three men were ruined.

When asked why they played such a hoax, they replied:

“he was so arrogant and despised us all.”

3. The Tasaday Tribe

What The Heck Was The Tasaday Tribe?

The Tasaday Tribe were a bunch of people forced to pretend that they were an ancient cave dwelling tribe.

Who Created this Hoax?

Manual Elizalde, head of PANAMIN (the Philippine government agency nonstock, nonprofit organization created to protect the interests of Philippine cultural minorities.)

Elizalde had all sorts of press and was able to get a picture of a Tasaday boy climbing vines to appear on the August 1972 edition of National Geographic He also got a National Geographic documentary named “The Last Tribes of Mindanao” created for the Tasaday.

Why Did he put on this Hoax?

Probably To steal money. He cleaned out millions from the Tasaday fund when he fled the country.

The Tasaday people were interviewed later on ABC’s show 20/20 and confessed that they were bribed with cigarettes, clothing, food and more to play along in Elizalde’s game.

4. The Great Moon Hoax

What was the Great Moon Hoax?

The Great Moon Hoax refers to a six article series put out by the New York Sun on August 25, 1835.

The articles went into great detail of crazy “non” mythical animals on the Moon, including bison, goats, unicorns, bipedal tail-less beavers and Batman.

"No one will find my secret Bat-Cave on the moon!"

(Okay they were actually bat-winged humanoids (“Vespertilio-homo”) who built temples on the moon, not bat caves, but close enough.

"I was the first Batman!"

All These discoveries were supposedly made with “an immense telescope of an entirely new principle”.

Of course when someone came to see this telescope, the hoaxers said it was so powerful that the sun turned the telescope into a giant “Burning Glass” that burned down the observatory, all the evidence, and vaporized the telescope.

Who perpetrated this hoax?

Authorship of the article has been attributed to Richard A. Locke, a Cambridge-educated reporter who, in August 1835, was working for the New York Sun.

Why did he do it?

Assuming that Richard A. Locke was the author, his intentions were probably, first, to create a sensational story which would increase sales of the New York Sun, and, second, to ridicule some of the more extravagant astronomical theories that had recently been published.

Its also possible that he took a hallucinogenic drug in the observatory and imagined the whole thing before burning it down himself.

5. War of The Worlds

What was the War of the Worlds Hoax?

The War of the Worlds was an American radio drama directed by Orson Welles, who adapted the H.G. Wells story titled “The War of the Worlds”

Presented as an actual news story, many listeners began to believe that Martians were in fact invading the U.S.A. Some listeners were seen fleeing in panic, thinking they could smell poison gas or see flashes of lightning in the distance.

It was said at the time that 1.7 million people believed the broadcast to be genuine, and out of those 1.2 million were genuinely frightened.

However, these numbers were later said to be inflated by newspaper companies who felt that radio threatened their position as the number one “Press Medium”

Image thanks to Wikipedia

Some of you may have heard of “The Legend of The Emerald Tablet” a.k.a. “The Secret of Hermes” and wondered, “Is there any reality to this wizardry?”

The answer is yes.

Now lets be clear.  At Daft Gadgets we would like nothing more than to prove that anyone of us can turn into a Jedi Knight or some cooler version of Harry Potter,  but that doesn’t mean we distort evidence to prove the existence of mythical beings.

According to “The Secret of Hermes” (based upon Hermes Trismegistus), the emerald tablet revealed the secret of the primordial substance and its transmutations. (Take That Darwin)

The Caduceus, symbol of Hermeticism.

Hermes was said to have been clutching the emerald tablet in his arms in his death bed.

Although this legend is in fact “A legend,” there have been some true wizards through out the ages that you may not have heard of.

The frist being….

1. Roger Bacon aka Doctor Mirabilis

"What came first, the name Bacon, or the food?"

The name “Dr. Mirabilis” is a medieval praise meaning: “Wonderful Teacher.”

This Wonderful teacher was known as an English philosopher and Franciscan friar who studied nature through empirical methods. He is sometimes credited as one of the first European advocates of the modern scientific method that was inspired by early Greek philosophers.

As one of the first real wizards, Roger Bacon:

-invented eyeglasses,

-revealed the role of air in burning, and

-predicted inventions of the future including cars, ships and aircrafts.

His Opus Majus contains treatments of mathematics, optics, alchemy (and the manufacture of gunpowder), the positions and sizes of the celestial bodies and how they could possibly influence the fate of humans.

He was also sent to jail at one point for being a magician or “Wizard” possibly due to his arcane knowledge of alchemy.

2. John Dee 1527-1608

John Dee was a noted English mathematician, astronomer, astrologer, occultist, navigator, imperialist who devoted much of his life to the study of alchemy, divination and Hermetic philosophy.

Basically…he was a wizard.

To some of his contemporaries, Dee was an “Evil Wizard.”

This may have been due to the fact that he was always trying to speak with angles through their universal language of creation in order to bring the apocalypse.

To be fair, Dee was actually trying to bring the Pre-Apocalyptic unity of human kind with a one world religion. Unfortunately, some saw this as just another step closer to the apocalypse, which was a pretty scary thought for most people, and may have led to his charges of treason and “calculating” in the year 1555.

The Calculating charge was for casting a horoscopes of Queen Mary and Princess Elizabeth and was just the first of many slander cases against the wizard.

Dee was an intensely pious Christian wizard who believed that the nature of the universe was an act of numbering and that mankind had the potential for divine power, if they could unlock the secrets to this number through mathematics.

His goal was to recapture the knowledge of the universe through the pure theology of the ancients and bring forth a unified world.

3. Paracelsus 1493 1541

“Many have said of Alchemy, that it is for the making of gold and silver. For me such is not the aim, but to consider only what virtue and power may lie in medicines.”

Paracelsus means equal to or greater than Celsus (Celsus being the 1st century Roman medical encyclopedist.)

The real name of this wizard was Philippus Aureolus Theophrastus Bombastus von Hohenheim (yes its a mouthful).

Paracelsus pioneered the idea of small chemicals to treat illness which was the basis for our modern day pharmacology

He is also recognized as giving Zinc its name, which is really important if you can imagine a world without zinc! (see video below)

4. Trithemius – 1462 1516

Trithemius’ most famous work is the Book Steganographia.

The book appears to be about magic at first glance, however scientists now belive the book was actually about cryptography. Now, Trithemius was accused of dealing with the occult. It was probably the view of those who couldn’t read the secret messages, that if someone is hiding something, it must be evil magic (actually all magic was evil back then)

Steganographia was the first book on secret codes.

5. Nicolas Flamel 1330-1417

According to some, Flamel was the greatist european alchemist of his time.

This posthumous reputation is mostly due to his reputed work on “the philosopher’s stone.” (no he didn’t write the Harry Potter book) Yes, that’s right, Flamel is said to have created the “elixir of life” and developed the ability to turn lead into gold!

Although no formal proof of this wizard’s claims exist, Flamel and his wife were noted for their wealth and philanthropy as have provided many other interpretations on the subject of alchemy.

He has also been referenced by great names like Victor Hugo, and Issac Newton, as well as pop culture references like Indiana Jones and Harry Potter.

Test Your Own Wizardry With Our Magic Levitating Wand!

1. Vladimir Demikhov Vs Dr. White:

I've heard of a dog chasing his tail, but never one chasing his head?

When someone faces the horror of seeing their pet get hit by a car they usually only have 2 options:

1. Bury the pet in the Pet Sematary where it will comeback to life possessed, or
2. Convert the Pet with the latest craze known as RC Taxidermy.

However something most of you haven’t thought of is sewing your pet’s head onto another animals body while its still alive.

Who the hell would be crazy enough to do this you ask?

Vladimir Demikhov, that’s who.

Vladimir Demikhov was a Mad Soviet Scientist and organ transplant pioneer. Known for sewing on extra heads to dogs and monkeys, Demikhov may be the first real mad scientist to follow in the footsteps of Mary Shelly’s Dr. Frankenstein.

"If you think my family doctor is bad, wait till you meet my psychiatrist"

His masterpiece is probably a puppy’s head grafted onto the neck of a full grown German Shepherd. The puppy head would lap at milk and drool in down the side of its mouth. Unfortunately, both animals died shortly after the experiment.

Of course this was during the cold war, and the Americans refused to be behind the Soviets in any technology, even multiple headed dogs. This led the American scientist Dr Robert White to transplant the brain of one dog into the neck of another dog. The question then became, “is this dog brain conscious, and if so, what type of doggy hell is it in?”

Dr White couldn’t answer this and decided to move on to bigger and better experiments like decapitating two monkeys and switching their heads.

Kind of makes you want to skip your yearly check up doesn’t it?

2. Shiro Ishii:

(No, were not getting any funnier just yet)

"I wasn't very funny"

Other than being known for the vivisection of living people (sometimes women he and the other doctors recently impregnated) amputating limbs and reattaching them to different parts of the body, freezing and unfreezing of a patients extremities, and purposely infecting patients with venereal diseases via rape, Shiro Ishii was known to be a selfish, pushy and disturbed individual who excelled at his studies.
His victims numbered around 10 000, receiving 600 per year from the kempeitai military police. He referred to his patients as “logs” and his research area as “The Saw Mill”

After Japan’s defeat in WWII, Ishii and his fellow mad scientists known as Unit 731 were granted immunity by the U.S. Government in exchange for the data he collected from torturing his victims.

3. Charles Bien Aime et Le Fol

(Charles the Loved and the Mad)

"I forgot I was King sometimes"

Charles was the King of France from 1380 – 1422 and is known as the once loved king of France who slipped into madness.

He first experienced psychosis in 1392 when his adviser, Olivier de Clisson, was almost murdered. Charles attempted to punish the would be assassin responsible by any means necessary. The person believed to be responsible was Pierre de Craon and was thought to be hiding in Brittany. Charles assembled a small army and set off to catch the assassin.

During the march, a barefoot leper sprung from the woods yelling at the King that he had been betrayed and continued behind the small army repeating his cries. Sometime later, a sun stroked page would drop his lance against the shield of another causing a very loud clanging sound. Charles then drew his sword yelling: “Forward against the Traitors!” and began fighting his own soldiers and killing a knight known as “The Bastard of Polignac.”

He was known to forget the names of his family members, as well as his own name. He also believed at one point his name was George who’s family crest was a stabbed lion. In another incident he forgot he was King entirely.

None of which was his craziest delusion…..

"They Called Me Mr. Glass" - Samuel L Jackson

His craziest of all delusions was the condition we now know as “Glass Delusion.” Here Charles believed that his body was made of glass and very breakable. This caused him to fear movement and completely forgo any personal hygiene regiment like bathing. At one point he became so filthy that his body became completely infested with lice.

At one point to combat this he attempted various procedure to protect his fragile body including custom made clothes that included iron bars sewn into them.

Take that Tony Stark.

comic photo thanks to wikipedia

4. Saparmurat “Turkmenbashi” Niyazov ,

(The Megalomaniac)

"My Name is Ozymandias, King of Kings, Look down on my works ye mighty, and Despair!"

After changing his name to “Turkmenbashi” meaning leader of all ethnic Turks, Niyazov then proceeded to declare himself “President for life”

He then went on a narcissistic reforming rampage renaming practically everything under his authority that didn’t already pay him homage.

His list of reforms include:

• He ordered every bottle of vodka to have a picture of his face on it, as well as every clock and watch in the country
• He ordered TV Stations to use his face as a logo
• He changed the name of the capital city airport to Turkmenbashi
• He replaced the port city Krasnovodsk with the name Turkmenbashi
• After a 670 lbs Meteorite hit the country, he declared it named Turkmenbashi
• He changed the names of street and schools to Turkmenbashi
• He changed the national anthem to reference his name in the chorus.
• He banned dogs from the capital because they smelled funny
• He banned gold teeth and encouraged people to gnaw on bones like dogs because dogs teeth didn’t fall out as easy.
• He banned smoking after he was forced to quit due to health problems
• He banned reporters from using make up.
• He renamed the month of January Turkmenbashi
• He renamed the month of September “Ruhnama” in honor of the book wrote by Turkmenbashi
• He banned Opera and Ballet
• He decreed that men should refrain from growing beards
• He declared that the average Turkmen doesn’t read books and as such ordered libraries to be closed.

And finally he banned Britney Spears

(okay he actually banned lip-syncing, but same idea)

Oh yeah, and he also commissioned the construction of an Ice palace with an arctic type zoo complete with penguins and other animals………in the middle of the hottest dessert in Asia.

Source: BBC Ice Zoo

5. Howard Hughes (The Aviator)

The Aviator

This Aviator tycoon who had a paranoid obsession with germs and cleanliness may have had a little more crazy to him than your average ocd.

His quirkyness has been referenced in comedy for years including a famous episode of the Simpsons where Mr Burns plays a parody of the eccentric tycoon and orders his assistant at gun point to get into a miniature wooden plane nicknamed “The Spruce Moose.”  (The Spruce Goose was a derisory nickname of Hughes plane the H4 Hercules) See the video link below.

Hughes’ antics included:

• An obsession with the size of peas (he used a special fork to separate them)
• He wrote an extremely detailed memorandum about how to prevent actresses Jane Russell’s blouse from “Bunching Up” on the set.
• He locked himself in his screen room where he sat naked on a chair watching movies for 4 months, eating only chocolate bars and milk and relieving himself in the empty milk bottles. During this time he also surrounded himself with Kleenex boxes and rearranged them continuously.
• He later moved into a bungalow at the Beverly Hills Hotel where he would sit naked watching movies with a pink napkin over his genitals. Somehow he spent 11 million dollars in that hotel that year.
• He became obsessed with his home state of Texas and began purchasing all the restaurant chains and 4 star hotels that had been founded their (some which were long out of business)
• He became obsessed with the film “Ice Station Zebra” and had it running on a continuous loop and was said to have watched it 150 times.
• Near the end of his life he surrounded himself with Mormons, not believing anyone else to be trustworthy

Here, is one of the more satirical take offs on the billionaire:

"I said, GET IN"

For Crazy Gadgets Check out our online store!

(photos compliments of wikipedia)

We realize everyone has their own opinion as to which superheroes are tougher, or who would win over who in a fight over who.  As such, at Daft Gadgets, we believe in democracy and everyone’s right to have their own wrong opinion as to who the toughest superpowerless heroes are.

We define a superpower, as something that is preternatural to humans. For example, mutants are an evolved branch from humans and their powers don’t count, so wolverine would have to fight with bleeding hands and the inability to regenerate faster than a normal human. Kwai Chang Caine gets his power from within his chi and as such we might count him if we liked him more, whereas nobody from the movie kungfu hustle would qualify for our list, even though we found them all to be very amusing.

So lets begin with

#5 Frank Castle a.k.a: “The Punisher”

Photo thanks to Wikipedia

Now the Castle isn’t known so much for his technique in hand to hand combat as he is for his “in your face” catch a fly with a bazooka mentality.  He employs many anti hero tactics like murder, kidnapping, extortion, coercion, threats of violence, and torture to get his way, so he’s kind of like a bad guy in an identity crisis.

These tactics take the readers focus off his supreme fighting skills as a well placed punch is often less exciting than a live grenade in someones pants or shot gun in someones mouth.

That being said, Castle is a war veteran trained as a master of martial arts, stealth tactics, guerrilla warfare, and almost every form of weaponry.

Who Did The Punisher Fight That Makes Him So Tough?

He fought Spiderman on more than one occasion, although he was defeated in the majority. He believed Spiderman was a killer and was tricked into seeking revenge against him.

He took out Rhino without any serious problems

He also defeated Venom when he learned Venom was the killer “Eddie Brock” (Although he let him go when he ran out of sniper bullets)

He defeated Daken, the mutant son of Wolverine

He broke his arm and sent him through three walls and on to a subway track where he electrocuted him and allowed a subway to run him down.

He also defeated Deadpool multiple times before blowing his head off. (which grew back) and Daredevil, who tried to come to the aid of the innocent Deadpool.

This is by no means a complete list of the Punisher’s top foes, but you get the idea.

#4. Ben Turner/Bronze Tiger

After killing his parents murderer with a Kitchen knife, Ben Turner turned to the martial arts as a way to help quell the inner rage of his soul. Studying along side Richard Dragon under the teachings of Master O-Sensei, Ben Turner became one of the greatest martial artists in world.

He has been considered by most to be one of the top 5 martial artists in the DC Universe and is still considered to be top 10 even though he has lost popularity over the years.

Who did he beat up that was so tough?

Uhhh…. Batman. More than once.

This alone is enough for Ben Turner to make our list.

#3. Lady Shiva

The Same Master O-Sensei that trained Ben Turner also had a god daughter named Sandra Woosan. Wooson is known to be the deadliest assassin the DC universe and currently goes by the code name “Lady Shiva”

Who did she beat up that makes her so tough?

Well she handled Victor Sage (the question) without much of a problem, although that was before his training with Richard Dragon.

She also defeated and helped retrain Batgirl (who turned out to be her daughter), and gave a pretty serious liking to the third Robin, “Time Drake”

Add to the list “Connor Hawke” (The Second Green Arrow)who was defeated during a martial arts tournament. (His life was spared at Robin’s request.)

On top of everything, she has mastered a move known as the Leopard Blow, that will apparently kill any opponent instantly, even the Great Richard Dragon.

#2. Shang Chi

Even the Great Iron Fist himself confessed that Shang Chi was a superior fighter, which is a pretty big deal since Iron Fist has the superpower known as “Shou Lou the undying”

Shang Chi’s name means a rising and advancing spirit. He has teamed up with the Sons of Tiger, Iron Fist, Jack of Hearts, White Tiger, Spiderman, the Thing, and even ROM the Space knight.

Shang is also a master of every martial arts weapon

Who has Shang Fought that makes him so tough?

Well, he did defeat and kill his father in a brutal engagement as well as his younger half brother “Moving Shadow”

Shang Chi also came to blows with the Man Thing (pardon the expression), The Shadow Stalker, Razor Fist, Shockwave, Skull Crusher, Zaran, Silver Samurai.

Who the hell would want to fight this thing?

He has also once held off a crowd of 30 super criminals for Captain America, a so called “super human”.

#1. Batman

It may come as no surprise that Batman is listed in the #1 slot.

Throughout the comic ages Batman has become one of the most powerful human beings in the DC Universe, despite having no superhuman powers.

By training with the most brilliant minds on the earth in the fields of science, biology, criminology, and other areas, Batman has molded himself in a Jeet Kune Do fashion that allows him to utilize his evolving strengths in a way no comic character has before him.

Who did Batman beat up that makes him so tough?

Uhhhh….Superman!

Unlike Doomsday, Batman didn't kill Superman, he just let him know who's boss

Yes, that’s right. Batman beat the daylights out of Superman. Batman believes Superman is a government sellout and prepares a final battlefield in his honor. Superman walks into traps of electricity and ultra sonic sound waves before finally taking a Kryptonite arrow (developed by batman) to the chest. Batman’s grasps the throat of Superman and delivers the final words:

“We could have changed the world…now…look at us…I’ve become a political liability…and…you…you’re a joke. I want you to remember, Clark…in all the years to come…in your most private moments…I want you to remember…my hand…at your throat…I want…you to remember…the one man who beat you.”

Batman is a master disguise artist and profiler, capable of ninja like stealth and Houdini like escapology. This allows him to treat every battle as just a battle in a much larger war. Although he refuses to take life, and has been forced to retreat, Batman becomes stronger after ever defeat. He has lost many one on one battles but has consistently proven himself as the victor of the war, and as such, wins the top spot among the superpowerless heroes.

Other notable mentions:

Wolverine (without powers)

Snake Eyes

Richard Dragon

Marv from Sin City

The King Pin

“I Want to Eat Your Children!” – Mike Tyson

Although many of us may remember the famous line directed to Lennox Lewis from Mike Tyson (he’s feeling much better now), most of us just shook it off as some random insanity from a declining superstar boxer.

However, some of us thought to ourselves: “I think he might actually do it if given the chance.”

At Daft Gadgets, we find that some of the best (and most interesting) ideas come directly from the realms of insanity and as such, we are not afraid to investigate deeper in to any insane ideas from eating children to working 9-5 jobs.

Believe it or not, it turns out that eating children isn’t that crazy at all!

In fact, some people have put forth some very logical arguments for the act of pedocannibalism (yes we made that word up.)

We’re going to save the moral debate of Exocannibalism vs Endocannibalism (no we didn’t make these words up)for another time and focus this post entirely around people who might eat your children.

The First being:

#5. Johnathan Swift

Photo thanks to wikipedia

Johnathan Swift was a satirist, and political pamphleteer who created great works like: Gulliver’s travels, The Battle of the Books, and A Modest Proposal.

A Modest Proposal is a guide to ease poverty by selling your children as food for the rich.

Swift delves deep to support his proposal, listing the calculations and financial benefits of pedocannibalism while making allusions to the overall yummyness of a prepared child.

Swift is quoted as saying:

“A young healthy child well nursed, is, at a year old, a most delicious nourishing and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragoust.”

Swift later argues that landlords have already devoured most of their parents and are therefore most entitled to the children as they already have experience in cannibalism.

Although Swift’s message is a Jab at using human’s a resources, we wouldn’t trust him with a newborn baby during any type of famine, particularly in any place dingos are known to roam.

#4. Saturn/Cronos

"Would you like fries with that?"

Cronos was the sun of Uranus.

He was known as Cronos to the “Greeks” and “Saturn” to the Romans. Cronos castrated his father and and threw his genitals into the sea. With his father out of the way, he became the supreme ruler of the universe.

Unfortunately it occurred to him, that if he could castrate and kill his father, one of his children may very well castrate and kill him!

Seeking the advice of a prophet, Cronos was told that in fact, one of his children would dispose of him in the future. This gave him the ingenious idea of eating his children. He figured that if he ate them when they were young and helpless, they would never grow up to hurt him.

Ironically, nobody wanted to hurt Cronos until he started eating children, and in the end he suffered a self fulfilling prophecy.

According to some, Zeus made Cronos the lead soprano in his choir before sending him to the underworld.

#3. Tantalus

Tantalus shows up in Homer’s “Nekuia” where he is suffering eternal torture in the Tartarus region of Greek Hell. Although he’s not really a pedocannibal,  he did create a feast for the gods where he stews his own son, Pelops. (Mmmm, Tantalizing!)

The gods weren’t really keen on eating humans, but the goddess Demeter was distracted by the loss of her daughter Persephone, and chowed down on Pelops like he was a chicken wing.

We’re not sure, but we think that this transgression is kind of like serving someone “Blue Shark” for dinner and then telling them its actually flipper the bottle nosed dolphin.
Eitherway, Tantalus isn’t someone you want around the Kitchen.

#2. Lamia

Another gift from the Greeks is the story of Lamia.

Queen Lamia was considered the avatar of beauty in libya. In fact, she carried with her a preternatural goddess like beauty that was probably passed down from her grand parents Poseidon and Lybie, although some tell her tale as the mistress of Zeus himself.

With the Zeus interpretation, Hera (Zeus’ wife) kills Lamia’s children, which in turn empowers her negative emotions to turn her into a serpent like demon.

Either way, Lamia is known as the demon devourer of children and has been commonly used by parents who wish to scare their children into obedience for centuries.

#1. Shrek

If you are familiar with the ways parents traumatize their children, you are also familiar with the story of Tom Thumb.

In the story, the mean ogre is trying to kill Tom and his brothers so he can eat them. Tom however, is a crafty lad, and tricks the Ogre into slitting the throats of his own children.

Now at Daft Gadgets, were pretty sure that this image is a great way to put kids to sleep. That being said, in order to protect your children from an ogre they will have to know what an ogre is, and judging from the photo above, its safe to say that Disney has slowly been getting “less real” and more “fairy tale” since they traumatized half the population by killing off Bamby’s mom with a shot gun blast.

So what is an Ogre?

Well, no one is really sure. The best description probably comes from Wikipedia where they state that an ogre is a large, cruel, monstrous and hideous humanoid monster that usually feed on humans. They are closely related to a troll, but are usually less malevolent.

So if you see someone or something that resembles this description, we suggest you run.

Believe us, Shrek becomes a lot less funny once you see him eat a baby.

Back somewhere in ancient Greece, a young philosopher by the name of Plato told a story about an idealistic city named Atlantis. Plato said that Atlantis was a “lost civilization” that fell beneath the sea.

Sea explorers have been searching for the lost city ever since, but did Plato send them on a wild goose chase? Did the City of Atlantis ever really exist?

At Daft Gadgets we’ve researched through the evidence of over 100 different crackpots and scientists to bring you the 6 most likely places the underwater city may be found.

1. Bimini Road

In 1938 a psychic by the name of Edgar Cayce used his imaginary powers to determine that Atlantis may be lost somewhere near Bermuda.

In 1968, it looked like there may be some truth to the clairvoyant’s claims when divers came across a mysterious line of stones, now known as the Bimini Road.

Sometimes referred to as the Bimini Wall, Bimini Road is an underwater rock formation near the Bahamas. Some people believe that the Bimini Road was a dry dock where ships could float in and then drained for repairs. Others believe is may hold the key to the lost city of Atlantis.

2. The Azores

As an archipelago in the mid Atlantic, some have postulated that the Azores are more than just beaches where North American tourists can see topless women. The Azores could actually be the remnants of a lost continent from as far back as the age of Pangea.

These beautiful islands of the Portuguese are actually the tips of a chain of underwater mountains. This may be partially attributed to Ignatius Donnelly’s book titled: “Atlantis, the Antediluvian world.”

Evidence has been shown to suggest that even though this area has been an undersea plateau for millions of years, some of these islands have actually risen over 250 meters above sea level.

This tells scientists that the sinking and rising of Atlantis may be a fully natural phenomenon.

3. Spartel Island

Back when humans were fighting the great woolly mammoth (Not to be confused with the great wooly bully by Sam Sham) there was a bunch of ice around the earth that would one day melt bringing an end to what we now call “The ice Age.”

When this happened, it drowned places like Spartel Island.

According to Dr. Jacques Collina Girard in an issue of “Comtes Rendus de l’academie des Sciences,” sea level around Atlantis may have been rising about 4 meters every 100 years during a time called “Meltwater Pulse 1A” This combined with a an earthquake proposed by Marc Andre Guscher may have led to giant tsunamis sweeping away the now lost city.

4. Andalusia

According to German doctor Rainer Kuhne, “fiction imitates fact”

The “lost” city of Tartessos, which disappeared in the 6th century BC, was once part of Andalusia, a region in modern day southern Spain. The Tartessians were traders well known to the Ancient Greeks and as such would have been known to Plato.

Satellite pictures of marshes in the area reveal traces of the Great Circular Walls of Atlantis. As well, the area looks to have been flooded in around 800-500 BCE, which is around the time a lot of researchers feel the city was lost.

Could the lost city of Andalusia be a real city for which a fictional city of Atlantis was based? Or could it be that Tartessians conquered the Alatians? Or did the Tartessians merely set up shop in the same place as the ruined city only to suffer the same fate?

Only time will Tell.

5. Thera

In 1960 Angelos Galanopoulos hypothesized that Thera was actually the site of the capital of Atlantis.
Geologists know that the island of Thera experienced an apocalyptic style eruption in 1600 BCE, practically destroying the island. This may have caused a tidal wave to engulf the entire Minoan civilization on Crete and possibly inspired the Altantis legend.

The reasoning behind the Thera/Alatian speculation include:

• The Minoans possessed advanced engineering knowledge and technology, including earthquake resistant wood and masonry walls. Yes they probably should have built volcano resistance walls instead, but we said they were “advanced” not “geniuses”

• Plato didn’t speak of a volcanic eruption, but did speak of an earthquake and a flood. This may also prove that the Alatians were time travelers who accidentally went back in time to save their ancestors from an earthquake instead of a volcanic eruption after reading Plato’s erroneous analysis.

• Similar Rock quarries are found on Santorini to what Plato spoke.

• Atlantis was described as having a circular style similar to the scientifically reconstructed shape of Thera before it was blown to smithereens. Of course, its not a jigsaw puzzle, so they could be piecing it together any way they want.

6. Cyprus

American explorer and architect Robert Sarmast created a detailed 3D computer map of the Mediterranean sea floor within the Cyprus Basin. He believes that images from his sonar data show man made structures.

The findings of copper and mini elephants (Cyprus Dwarf Elephants) along with the festival name “Kataklysmos” all support his theory that the lost city lies beneath.

Unlike most scientists, when asked how Atlantis was lost he points to the bible citing Noah’s Flood. However, if it was caused by Noah’s Flood, why didn’t Noah save any of these mini elephants? His instructions were two of each animal and quite frankly it seems like it would be a heck of a lot easier to float and feed two 500lbs mini elephants over their modern day 10 tonne Elephantidae relatives.

Either way, the Atlantis city is unlikely to be found until someone dons a killer skuba suit that can take a diver below to the deepest depths of the ocean, or Aquaman returns from his vacation.

#5. The Underground City Beijing

The Dixia Cheng Entrance to the Underground City

Also known as “Dixia Cheng” Beijing’s underground city is actually a bomb shelter made up from a network of tunnels located underneath the city itself.

It was originally built to protect the Chinese population from a Soviet nuclear strike and is considered to be a very damp, darkened, and spooky place where teenagers make out and possibly hunt for mole people.

The 85 square km tunnels underneath Beijing allow lots of room for the mole people to exercise and indicate that should an invasion commence, hand to hand combat should most likely be avoided.

The complex was originally equipped with restaurants, clinics, schools, theaters, factories, and a roller skating rink. As well, all the farming outlets were suspiciously geared toward foods that the mole people are known too eat. These included a mushroom farm and other foods that require little light to grow.

We’re not sure if there are, or ever were mole people in China, but if there are you can bet you’ll find them somewhere underneath Tiananmen square, the Temple of Heaven, the Forbidden City or the Western Hills of Beijing.

#4. The Catacombs of Rome

The 40 known suburban Roman catacombs were constructed along the consular roads of Rome and are known as the Appian way, the via Ostiense, the via Labicana, the via Tiburtina, and the via Nomentana.

Although many people believe that the Catabombs of Rome were used to bury Christians in secret, this has been proven to be untrue. It is much more likely that these catacombs were used to either trade with ancient mole people or perhaps just as a regular “non secret” burial ground for Christians.

Although most scientists agree that the original construction of Rome had nothing to do with Mole People, they also have to agree that if mole people currently do exist, the catacombs of Rome would be a prime location for them to inhabit.

#3. RESO

RESO or La Ville Souterraine, is located in downtown Montreal, Quebec, Canada.

Being the largest underground complex in the world, it is also known as “ville Interieure” or The Indoor City.  The indoor city is comprised of a collection of tunnels that connect shopping malls, apartment buildings, hotels and condos, banks, offices, museums, universities, an amphitheater, arena, as well as bus and train stations.

The connecting tunnels themselves are usually fully air conditioned and large enough to have shops on both sides. In the winter there is central heating, which makes it a very popular spot for those looking to avoid the harsh Canadian winters.

The Underground City Reso is used by ½ a Million people per day, and is full capable of sustaining a population of mole people.

Of course, the mole people would have to  be fluent in French in order to blend in.

#2. Edinburgh Vaults

The Edinburgh Vaults we more than just a place for the serial killers like Burke and Hare to hide their new cadavers.  They also housed taverns, cobblers, tradesmen, and criminals for over 30 years. (on a Daft note the term “Burking” meaning to kill someone by smothering them is attributed to the serial killers Burke and Hare)

The Vaults deteriorated over the years due to poor air quality and damp conditions causing all the reputable businesses to leave, vacating them for the poor. With no running water or sanitation, people would essentially be throwing buckets of fecal matter in the streets. The fecal matter would roll down hill, where the poorest and weakest and sickest families in the underground hell would be forced to live.

Scotland did have a solution for all this however, and that was to build an entirely new Edinburgh over top of the other one so the rich people didn’t have to see such things. This created a sort of “Tale of Two Cities” in Scotland.

Somewhere around 1875 the vault portions of the underground city were filled in with rubble and closed off, possibly due to the fear of a mole people invasion (although these mole people were just really sick humans who lived underground)

The Tunnels were rediscovered by Norrie Rowan and used to help a Romanian Rugby player escape the Romanian secret police.

#1. Paris

Hidden beneath the city of romance is a secret world of catacombs, ancient roman limestone quarries, sewers, and more. The underground of Paris is also complete with an underground shopping center and a central hub express metro system called the RER.

The RER links to the vast collection of tunnels and quarries, some of which have been abandoned and now carry a 1940s retro ghost station feel. This type of unsupervised pathway could potentially make it very easy for the mole people to mobilize unnoticed. In fact these tunnels used to run boat tours underneath the city before bank robbers started using them to escape.

Police also found a fully equipped movie theater in 2004, so the mole people could be using the underground city for their own amusement park as well.

Although now illegal, many urban adventurers still risk going deep underground searching for graffiti from dead Nazis, dead French resistance and looking to find a possible skeleton. For example,  Philbert Aspairt ventured into the underground city in 1793 and never returned. Ironically his skeleton was found only a few yards from the exit. As well, the skeleton of an escaped monkey was found to much to the surprise of Parisians. However, the skeletal find of them all came in 1786 when 6 million skeletons were transferred to the limestone quarries, all stacked up in elaborate patterns.

As exciting as it sounds, exploring the underground city in Paris is no picnic. There are only a few known entrances, and they are all guarded by the police who go after anyone who enters.

Oh well. At least we know the Mole People will have to get through a few cops before the make it into the city.

6. Raining Frogs and Animals

You may have heard the old saying “Its raining cats and dogs” and thought to yourself “Where the heck did this saying come from?”
Or maybe you haven’t.  Either way, we at Daft Gadgets have sought out the answer for you.

Although there has never been a report of cats and dogs falling from the sky, there have been quite a few real reports of raining animals from across the globe.

Some historical examples of raining animals include:

• in 1873 Kansas City, Mo experienced a shower of frogs.
• in 1968 Acapulco Maggots fell from the sky
• in 1996 Tasmania rained jellyfish. A popular raining animal, Jellyfish fell from the sky in Bath, England, in 1894

So how does this happen? What causes the weather to start raining animals?

Raining animals is a phenomenon that scientist can’t actually explain. It happens so rarely that there is not enough concrete data for anyone to analyze effectively, although many have theorized a range of possible causes.

The French physicist André-Marie Ampère was one of the first scientists to actually believe that raining animals was more than just some whopper of a tale from a group of local drunkards.

Ampère suggested that at times frogs and toads travel in very large numbers, and are small enough that a violent wind could swoop them up from the ground carrying them great distances.

Newer scientific theories favor the phenomenon of tornadic waterspouts. The Tornadic Waterspouts are powerful enough to suck up small animals and debris, sending them soaring into the air.

Scientists believe that some of these tornadoes can suck up a entire pond and all its aquatic inhabitants, and when the tornado lets the water fall, the marine life falls with it, creating the illusion of raining animals.

Although a very convincing theory, it does not explain how all the animals involved in each individual incident would be from only one species, and not a group of similarly-sized animals from a single area.

5. Fire Devils

What is a Fire Devil

A “Fire Devil” is the colloquial name for a fire whirl. Its comprised of hot air shooting up as it flames spins into the cooler air above, pulling up terrifying ropes of fire that whirl furiously into the sky.

So its kind of like Ghost Rider’s Chain

One of the most devastating fire devils occurred in Japan in 1923 during the Great Kanto Earthquake. The Earthquake ignited a gigantic fire devil that killed 38,000 people in fifteen minutes.

Most of the larger fire devils are spawned from wildfires. They are usually 10-50 meters tall but can be up to a Kilometer in height and contain winds over 160 km/h, uprooting trees in their fire tornado havoc.

Where can I see a Fire Devil?

You can see some pretty impressive fire devils at the annual Burning Man Festival in Nevada’s Black Rock Desert. On Saturday night you get the burning man, on Sunday you get the burning temple.

4. Ball Lightning

What is Ball Lightning?

Is it plasma? (hot electrically charged gas) or plasma trapped by aerosols (floating dust or droplets)
Glowing Silica (A Crystal compound) vaporized when lightning strikes soil?

Although reported from many independent sources, ball lightning is a phenomenon that science still knows very little about.

Ball lightning is thought to be any type of electrically charged ball ranging from the size of a pea to a few meters in diameter. It is said that after ball lightning explodes, it lets out a sulphur like smell, similar to the Lightning Ball like benefactors of the science fiction novel “Orbis” by Scott Mackay.
However, modern day ball lightning has yet to attempt to enslave humanity.

Where Can Ball Lightning be Seen?

Once form of ball lightning occurs commonly in the valley of Hessdalen, Norway, and has been reported since the early 1940s. It is suggested that these “light balls” or “Hessdalen Lights” are the product of alpha particles creating the ionization of dust and air during radon decay in the atmosphere.

Apparently over 5% of Americans have witnessed ball lightning when they were sober. (Or at least so they claim)

3. St Elmo’s Fire

You may have heard the term “St Elmos Fire” and pictured in your mind something like this:

Or perhaps you envisioned a tickle me Elmo doll burning in heaven. Either way, you would be wrong. The St Elmos Fire we are referring to looks more like pink balls of fiery light that dance on the masts of ships.

What causes St Elmos Fire?

Its thought to be caused by the buildup of static electricity, which in turn then heats up the air and turns it to a plasma. The Nitrogen and Oxygen in the Earths atmosphere causes St. Elmos’s fire to fluoresce with indigo colored light.

At least, that’s the going theory.

2. Bloody Snow

Back in 1818 ships encountered ice cliffs in the arctic that seemed to be streaming with blood. Back then, something like that might lead to a little superstition paranoia and possibly a human sacrifice.

Today however, bloody snow usually just make people think someone was recently murdered, and they go about their business as usual.

What is Bloody Snow?

Bloody snow is actually snow mixed with red algae named Chlamydomonas Nivalis. For some reason it is said to have a faint scent of fresh watermelons.

Where can I see Bloody Snow?

Bloody snow is common in the summertime in alpine and coastal polar regions worldwide. This includes the Sierra Nevada of California in the USA.

1. Red Sprites

Above a Thundercloud you can see giant red lightning pillars called sprites, huge pancakes of lighting named elves, and beams that shoot up from the top of the cloud known as blue jets.

Sprites are triggered by the discharges of positive lightning between an underlying thundercloud and the ground. They occur high above a thunderstorm cloud and form in many cool shapes.

Sprites get their name from the mischievous air spirit named “Puck” in Shakespear’s “A Midsummer Nights Dream”

#1. Tightlacing

Tired of Diets that don’t work? Now you can get real thin real fast by moving around your organs!

What is Tightlacing?

Tightlacing is the practice of wearing tightly laced garments to make your body appear more curvy.

Is it dangerous?

No this isn’t anything dangerous like some sort of plastic surgery, tightlacing or “corsetry is the act of squeezing your waist together over long periods of time so that your body will readjust your spleen in way that takes up much less space in your abdomen.

Now there are some side effects. For example, your lung capacity will diminish and cause you to breath intercostally (from the upper part of the lung), but this also makes for bigger boobs, so again, its a trade off.

As an added bonus, the tight compression on your stomach prevents you from over eating, so you’ll lose weight too!

Does it Hurt?

Well, they say beauty is painful, but we like to think of a corset as being a nice big hug for your body. And who doesn’t like to get hugged?

#2. Cranial Binding

Ever wonder if you were actually spawned by aliens?

At Daft Gadgets we’re pretty sure that in some galaxies a big pointy coned head must be attractive. At least this is the only reason we can come up with to describe the insane head flattening practices of the Ancient Myans.

What is Cranial Binding?

Its the method of apply long term force and pressure on someone’s skull in order to change its shape without breaking it. It was believed that someone with an “egg head” was somehow smarter or more spiritually enlightened than your every day common round head.

Are these techniques dangerous?

Possibly to an Adult because an adult’s skull is a fusion of 22 different bones into a single skull. Luckily, this procedure was performed on babies whose skulls were comprised of 44 unfused and mmalleable boney elements.

Did these Head Flattening techniques Hurt?

Uh….well you would have to ask the babies who had their heads put in vices to find out, and as we know very well, babies can’t talk. This thereby proves that there is no proof that flattening heads causes pain when using the advanced alien ancient Mayan technology seen below.

#3. Tooth Sharpening

Photo compliments of star trek memory alpha .org

More than just for Klingons and Ferrengi, tooth sharpening can be a great way to pick up ladies if you’re a guy, however females with sharpen teeth have been known to scare males away in some species.

What is Tooth Sharpening?

Tooth sharpening is the process of filing down teeth until they are nice and pointy.  Kind of like a shark or dinosaur would have.

In the Bali culture, straight teeth were thought to represent anger and jealousy.

As you can tell this guy below doesn’t look angry at all!

Does it hurt.

We’re not sure, but there is something about the thought of grinding teeth that gives us that “nails on a chalkboard” feeling.

Are these techniques dangerous?

Well maybe, but they are probably still less dangerous than the ancient Chinese Ta Ya Kih Lau tradition of knocking out a brides teeth on their wedding day (it was thought that this would prevent damage to the husbands family)

#4. Neck Rings

First there was the Mamenchisaurus then there was the Giraffe, and then the uhhh Padaung?

What the hell are these Neck Ringed Padauangs ?

Padaungs (not to be confused with the Jedi Students named “Padawans”) are also known as Kayan Lahwi.  Ironically the Borneo Kayan were once fierce warriors and “Head Hunters,” so were not really sure why the Burma Kayan would make their heads easier to cut off?

Does it hurt?

Probably. Nick rings are essentially an ever growing coil that wraps around your neck more and more as you grow and become deformed.  Kind of like a boa constrictor that never loosens its grip on your neck, but never squeezes tight enough to kill you.

Are they dangerous.

There is no proven medical concern at this time, but do we really need some scientist to tell us that elongating the appearance of our necks is unsafe?

#5. Sclera Tattooing

Compliments of Random Places Photostream on flickr

Hey, you know how to make yourself look really cool? Stick an ink filled needle in your eye.

What is it?

Unlike Corneal Tattooing that may be used for medical reconstruction of your eyes, scelra tattooing is a newer more extreme process of body modification. Its basically tattooing the whites of your eyes.

Does it hurt?

If you believe the experts, no, it doesn’t hurt. Apparently there are no nerve endings on the surface of your eyes.

Is it Dangerous?

The after effects include minor pain, bruising, and discomfort as well as some blistering, but if done incorrectly sclera tattooing could lead to blindness.

If you are looking for less whacked out beauty tips you can check out our Gadgets for Him and Gadgets for Her section at DaftGadgets.com

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