The #7 Movie of All Time That Never Existed – The Top 10 Movies That Never Existed

Written by Jason Scott. Posted in Daily Daft

 

 

snakes on a train

Not the snakes on a train we’re talking about, but it proves we had a point.


#7 Snakes on a train


Snakes on a train is a story about one mans struggle (Abdul Shamir Hassan) to fulfill his dream of creating a Hollywood movie.


While taking a train from A -B Abdul overhears what he thinks are legitimate Hollywood movie producers, talking about a new movie in the making.    In fact they are sarcastically poking fun at Hollywood’s lack of imagination, and prophesying about how little thought was going into creating stories. The pundits begin laughing about a possible new movie called “Snakes on a Train” the sequel to the previous Hollywood flop “Snakes on a Plane”.


Abdul doesn’t get the sarcasm, and begins to question the movie pundits to see if there is room for him to be part of the new blockbuster. They begin to explain what they call “the secret to Hollywood success” which is to buy the rights to a sequel of an already profitable movie.


After discussing the ins and outs of movie making they sell Abdul the unauthorized rights to the sequel of “snakes on a plane”. Overjoyed he begins diligently pursuing lawyers and other movie makers with his new franchise. Of course the legitimate people don’t have time for him, which leads him from one fraudster to another.  One by one they not only take Abdul’s money, but also show him how to manipulate his credit rating so he can secure loans to help cover their exorbitant fees.  This slowly forces Abdul into an unpayable massive debt, bleeding his family dry.


All looks hopeless until a chance meeting places Abdul with a fellow filmmaker (Mike Moral) who sits down with Abdul to explain the Hollywood business to him. With the help of a bugs bunny cartoon Mike explains to Abdul that he has essential bought the rights to the Brooklyn Bridge. As they begin to discuss the corruption and greed in the industry they realize that with a little more footage they could have a documentary about the evils of the movie industry, with the “snakes” being the Hollywood shyters.


Abdul revisits some of the unscrupulous business men with his hidden camera. They are all too happy to hear from him since he tells them his has come into more money.


In the end, Abdul gets his wish, and the documentary “Snakes on a Train” is a moderate success.

Top 10 Movies of all time that don’t exist #8 – #6

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Jason Scott

"They will Rue the Day They Gave Me Free Reign Over this Blog" Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! (insert evil into laughter)

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